Saturday, March 13, 2010

venting session

I'm not looking for comments or a response to this post because, honestly, you'll only be saying something because you didn't before and now you see that your lack of action upset me and you feel like making a lame attempt to apologize and rectify the situation. The people who I am truly speaking to probably will never see this post anyway. That being said, lets begin...

Frankly, I feel unappreciated. I don't have many friends and that's okay, but I try to show my love and gratitude for the ones I do have as often as possible (and appropriate). I put a lot of thought and effort into every post and, to me, it feels all for naught. I'm considering discontinuing my blog all together. Whats the point? I write a very thoughtful post about someone I love on their birthday, I post the link to their facebook page to make sure they are aware of it, and thats it. No response. No comment. I don't want much, just maybe a "thank you! thats so sweet!" or an "aw! love you, too!" or possibly even "thanks so much. I'm so glad we're friends." Am I just out of my mind to expect a response? I mean, seriously, is that crazy? Don't answer. That was more of a rhetorical question since I mentioned earlier that if you comment, it will just feel like "a lame attempt to apologize and rectify the situation." I don't mean to be harsh, I just feel like I poured my heart into those posts telling my friends how much I truly care for them and am grateful for their existence in my life for absolutely nothing. Maybe there is a truth to the idea that people would really rather lead shallow lives with very limited outbound emotion.

I'm done venting now. If you read all of this, I apologize for wasting your time.

P.S. If there is anyone who needs further explaining concerning this post, please read the comments. I thought everything I said was very straight to the point, but I have been informed that some of it can be misinterpreted. So please, read the comments.


  1. lol you'll never get any sort of apology out of me in order to 'rectify' a situation - but I will give it to you straight...

    I think you're being incredibly selfish right now, and you can hate me for making this comment all you want - but I'll give it to you straight...

    you, being the religious person you are... are supposed to understand that you do things out of the kindness of your heart, not because you expect something in return... that's selfish... because that means you never did it out of the kindness of your heart... and what's worse, you make us, your readers, look back to see who you're talking about - and it's Kacie - and now you make her out to be a horrible person... maybe she was busy... maybe it slipped by... but who freakin cares! It's a blog... it's an online journal... it's not a talk show were people tune in on a weekly basis for your wise input on life...

    and the sad part is... if you had actually had the maturity to call Kacie and explain your frustration with her, she could have explained... but you've decided to make a public ranting about this... and post it on facebook... it's a pathetic cry for help...

    and on top of it... you're married... you feel unappreciated?? you only need your husband to appreciate and love you... yet you're looking for appreciation, love and support from people you moved away from... I'd hate to see how your husband thinks about you posting this... and the fact that you think people would actually respond to this apologizing online in order to try and "fix" things... nothing's broken... you're just not happy with your current situation

    someone had to give it to you straight - and I don't mean to offend - I hope you understand

    I will be interested to see how long this stays up for though.

  2. I don't hate you for making that comment. You obviously got upset by what I said which, despite what you may think, wasn't my intention. I also think a lot of things I said got misinterpreted, which is only my fault and I apologize for. So, if you will allow me, I'll clear some things up.

    As far as being unhappy in my current situation, it’s simply not true. The only way I could be happier is if I lived closer to my family. That’s it. I’ve got an amazing husband who loves me and shows me that every second of the day. I’m starting school on Monday and I’m so excited to start taking steps forward in terms of furthering my education and beginning a career. I am finally directing my life on a path that makes me happy and will continue to thru the eternities.

    I thought it was clear that my feeling of being “unappreciated” was restricted to this instance alone, but apparently not so I’ll clear that up. I love my husband. There is no one who makes me feel more appreciated. I feel appreciated by a lot of people, including my parents, my siblings, and a few friends. My posts were simply to make other people feel loved and appreciated. This most recent post was to point out that when a kind word is said, sometimes a thank you would be nice. No, not necessary, but it always helps to feel like your efforts are noticed and appreciated. Everyone knows what it feels like and it doesn’t feel good.

    And frankly, my frustration was NOT directed mainly at you, Kacie. I have made countless efforts towards another friend that have been completely ignored. Would that make you feel better if I make a side note that removes you from the situation?

    Finally, I hardly ever get comments on any of my posts, whether they are written to a specific person or not. If you noticed, that was the other main reason for my post. I don’t see the point of writing on here every few days if no one reads them and I don’t know that anyone reads them unless they comment. So thank you, Kacie, for commenting and making me feel like my blog is noticed.

  3. ... lol ... you can ask her yourself, but this isn't kacie that posted on your blog... and I still stand behind everything I said... because you don't need a thank you - you need to stick with what you just said and realize you have much to be thankful for and you are appreciated I'm sure by many people - for you to dwell on one minor little detail when you should have... been the adult... and used your words with the people that bring you frustration, none of this would have happened... what also frustrates me is your profile on this page, and the words you used to describe yourself... about the fact that you don't miss who you were or the people you knew a year ago... the people you left back at home - yet you expect them to read your blog on a daily basis and appreciate ... what?? that you've thought of them??

    lol - again - this isn't anyone that's at all offended by your post at all - this is just someone calling you out on something that was ridiculous, selfish, and self-pitying...

    please though, write about something actually worth a damn they are much more interesting to read...

  4. You continue to amaze me. Do you really have nothing better to do with your time than rag on me for a little venting session? Yes, it was selfish. It’s supposed to be! It’s MY blog! I write about what I want to. That’s the WHOLE POINT. I will not apologize for being honest. You have blatantly expressed your feelings on MY blog. Why can't I do that also? On MY BLOG??? The hypocrisy astounds me!

    My post wasn't in reference to anyone "back home," so please stop with the assumption that I'm expecting something out of people who I "left." I left because I needed a change. I was surrounded by poor influences and it would have been near impossible for me to amend the direction my life was headed in that situation. Yes, I admit that I was weak then and would not have had the courage or self-confidence to stand up to my then supposed "friends." Furthermore, these “friends” were manipulative, conniving, and backstabbing. Excuse me for not apologizing for not missing them. I am truly better off without them. I can only thank my Heavenly Father for guiding me to the decision to go to Utah and move away from these people. Granted, not everyone I knew back home falls under this category. Those people know who they are since I regularly keep in contact with them, despite my leaving.

    P.S. I’m sorry that the whole world is not always smiling and happy. Crap happens. Feelings get hurt. You are truly a lucky person since this has OBVIOUSLY never happened to you. If it had, I would like to assume that you would have some understanding on how the world works and maybe give it a rest.

  5. AGAIN I say kens- shake the haters off. I think you are fabulous.

  6. Aw, thanks Ash. I really appreciate it. Its amazing how a kind word can make you feel good... like a THANK YOU! haha Kinda my whole point! :0)

  7. I like reading your blog... and I like being cranky and venting on my own blog. Point is, it's a blog, not the autobiography of Caresse... it doesn't have to take in to account the big picture. Just the feelings you're feeling at a moment. Silly Anonymous. Glad you're loving life!

  8. And your about to be a mom? Wow... Seriously? Grow up

  9. Wow. Who says that? That is the lowest thing I could ever imagine anyone saying. And are you REALLY still lingering on this whole ordeal over a month later? You just made yourself look like the biggest jerk. Congrats and, please, don't comment on any of my blogs again.